Day Five: March 15th Crystal is finally feeling better but I am doing worse. We begin to think its the food I was eating, as we didnt eat the same thing at breakfast. We spend most of the day just relaxing around the resort and taking a much needed nap. We decided to go out for a nice dinner so we headed down to La Isla Mall. We found a place called La Madonna which was an Italian and Swiss Grill and Martini Bar. It was AMAZING!! I had a Rib Eye and Crystal had a seafood pasta. It was one of the best steaks I have ever had and they had the best lobster bisque I have ever tasted in my life. It was pretty pricey but if you can manage it I would highly recommend it. They also have about 500 different martini's so at least you have options. We were going to go to The Chocolate City for dessert but it was rather busy so we did some shopping instead and headed back to the hotel. We had a few drinks at the bar and decided to stay in so that maybe we can FINALLY make it to Oasis. Day Six: March 16th. We get up early, grab a red bull, and make it to Oasis. We get there rather early so we hop in the water and head to the back pool bar and start drinking. We run into Joe and a couple of his friends. Joe was supposed to be leaving on a plane in a hour and hadnt even left yet. They leave to sort things out and we meet some guys from Paris. They were trying to teach me French and I taught them a little Chinese. We eventually made our way down to the beach and got one of those pineapple drinks. Those things we strong!! After that it was a lot of wandering around and meeting people. Ended up running into Joe again who had missed his flight and decided to stay longer. Near the end of the day we had met some Royal Marines in the pool and talked to them for a few hours. A drunk foreign guy and his friends wander up and start saying vulguar things to us and making lewd motions. We ignore him, which he doesnt like, so he jumps in the water and pulls me under, while he goes up to breathe he is still keeping me under. Jerk. I eventually got away and went to stand next to Crystal when he got distracted. His other drunk friend walks up to us and goes to stick his face in Crystals boobs. She says no and pushes him away. He goes again, she resists again. He grabs her and goes again so I shove him off and give him some choice words. When he begins to come back for more one of the Royal Marines stepped in a took care of things. Just a head up kiddos, sexual assault is never a good trick for picking up women. :icon_eek: We eventually make it back to Dos Playas and keep drinking at the pool bar. We decide to go out to Coco Bongo since we had yet to try a big club. We headed out a little early so we got our wrist bands and went to the Congo Bar. After doing a few shots we make our way to the Coco Bongo line and run into some of the Aussies from our resort. Once we get inside we lose them. The place was ridiculously crowded, hot and playing awful music. We HATED it! We tried to stick it out but eventually swam through the crowd to get to the exit. Considering the night a fail we head back to the hotel. We run into one of the Aussies from the club in the parking lot and he has a huge black eye. I guess someone elses night was worse than ours. To be continued....
Day Seven: March 17th We hung around the pool for a bit and then headed out to Margaritaville for dinner. The place was crazy crowded. We had some drinks there and were going to go to Pat O's since it was St. Pattys Day but the place was ridiculous. We headed into town instead and were told that The City was free for open bar for girls on Wednesdays. We got our wrist bands but since it wasnt open went into the Corona Bar (also free). All of the wait staff and half of the security knew me by name and giving me kisses. I was really confused. I guess the last time I was there, though injured, I was a really big hit. After drinking there for a bit we head into The City. I like the place a lot. It wasnt crowded and the music was great. I met some guy who's opening line was "I went to Harvard and all the girls want to marry me." I informed him that I, in fact, had no Desire to marry him. Apparently this was an open invitation to follow me around all night. I spent half the night trying to keep away from him. When we got back to our hotel some random Mexican guys stopped us on the way in. He didnt speak much english but was determined to have a conversation with us. We talked for about 30 minutes in our broken spanish (though I was really impressed at how much Crystal remembered) and finally got away from him. He was a weird guy. Day Eight: March 18th We head back to Oasis and get our drink on. We run into Joes friends from England and go to their room for shots. Bacardi shots are not my favorite but they did they trick. Oasis wasnt very crowded that day but we still had fun. I met a guy from Hawaii who taught me how to swim in the ocean properly. Crystal and I also had a nice laugh when a flock of birds attacked a school of fish and about five SB's were stuck in the middle. It is always funny when grown men scream like girls. We head back kinda late to the hotel and just hungout for the night because the next day was going to be crazy. Day Nine: March 19th Our final day to go to Oasis we decide to hit it really hard. We head down there with SteveO and his friend and a few of the Aussies. We all separate when inside and Crystal and I down three drinks in ten minutes and do our best to keep that pace up. Time gets a little blurry but we ran into KP. We went up to his room to get some shots and his radio. He gives us some awesome Mexican flag beads and lots of shots. While he and Crystal are talking I randomly wander out of the room. When I turn around to go back I am at the wrong room. Five rooms later I realize I had somehow ended up on the wrong floor. Eventually I found my way back. Crystal was nearly panicking. We all headed back down to the bar and did more shots. Crystal and I wandered off and next thing I remember we are on stage dancing. This is all fuzzy for me but I believe there was something about a midget with a blow up doll. I kept grabbing peoples bottles who were standing in front of the stage and just taking big gulps. Next thing I know Ayiia and Derek from The Real World: Cancun were on stage too. That was odd. (This part of the story I don't remember but was told by Crystal) It was near the end of the day and Crystal and I decided to take a swim. When we got off stage she said there were alot of guys surrounding us as we made our way though the crowd (as a lot of the girls had gone in to get ready) Crystal said we had to shove our way through until I started flipping everyone off. Any person I saw, I was flipping off, even the ones in the distant (I'm such a lovely drunk). After swimming in the ocean for awhile Crystal told me to get out, much easier said than done. The waves and seashell shore were knocking me over constantly. Crystal thought I was joking and let it go on for awhile. I escaped with several cuts and bruises when someone finally helped me out. After getting some pizza we went back to the hotel. Crystal went to the room and I ran up to the pool. Apparently I made my rounds talking to everyone and running around like a maniac. I also gave a bunch of people massages (guys and girls) and took lots more shots. I think I stumbled back to the room at 2am. Day Ten: March 20th Woke up HAMMERED! Its the best way to avoid hangovers haha. I got some ice cream from the little shop and Crystal and I headed to Senor Frogs for lunch. Crystal was continuously molested which was hilarious and I continued drinking to avoid my hangover. Every male waiter was mesmerized by Crystals "Chichis" I just sat back and watched. We then tried shopping at the flea market but it was more intense than I expected so we went to the malls and got the rest of our gifts for people back home. After heading back to the hotel we met up with everyone at the hotel pool. We found out that about 20 of them were heading to Corona Bar. We decide "Why the hell not" and go with them for our last night. We all get the huge section with the padded seats and bottles of Smirnoff all night. It was soo much fun and we were probably there until 3am. Last Day: March 21st Got up early to pack our things and get something to eat. Our transfer showed up early and then didnt believe that he was there for me because "Williams is a guys name." He then was angry cause he thought there were three of us. Once we finally got to the airport (he went soooooo slow) the lines were HUGE. Luckily the Frontier line was empty...Yay us! We had lunch in the airport and I swear to the Lord that I saw Jimmy Fallon there. I was just too hungover to do anything about it. Anywho we made it home safely. It was great meeting you all and I had soooo much fun!! I cannot wait for next year and I hope to see a few of you in between now and then! Have a good year and be safe!
i believe on the 16th i saw you at the pool and gave u a shot of goose also that midget was running around the oasis the whole week plastered good times
i was trying to tell ya but u were tanked and i had to head back to the room cuz we had people coming over.
Wow! Drunk 24X7, hangovers, motorboatin' boobs, crazy Mexicans, Clubs, busted knees, bruises, birds attacking, Tequila, shots, more Tequila, drunk midgets, Royal Marines, sex abuse, Mexican flag beads, more shots, flipping everyone off, cuts and bruises – Ladies you've covered a life time in one SB ! ! :biggrinbandit: That’s' some extreme stuff, you chicks rock! :headbanger: Now where are the pics?
