April 2011 roll call...hahaha!!!!!

You have to check out the "Michigan seems to be the best place to rob a bank" link in the Free for All.

What a riot!

 

Keeping it on top!!

so.. I was reading over this thread starting from page one.. its pretty funny!!

 

Only since I started posting on it, Kidding! This is the first place I check for my daily joke when I get to work.

 

Ya that was really funny Bruce

 

Prediction For a Cold Winter

The Indians asked their Chief in autumn if the winter was going to be cold or not. Not really knowing the answer, the chief replied that the winter was going to be cold and that the members of the village were to collect wood to be prepared.

Being a good leader, he then went to the phone, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter going to be cold?" The man on the phone responded, "This winter is going to be quite cold indeed."

So the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more wood to be well prepared. A week later he called the National Weather Service again, "Is it really going to be a very cold winter?" "Yes", the man replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."

So the Chief went back to his people and ordered them to go and collect every scrap of wood they could find. Two weeks later he called the National Weather Service again: "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"

"Absolutely," the man replied, "the Indians are collecting wood like crazy!"

 

Keeping it on top!!

An Indian walked into the local welfare office to pick up his cheque.
He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just
HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."
The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent.
We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a
chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have to
drive around in his 2008Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of
your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll
also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips.
This is rather awkward to say but you will also have, as part of your
job assignment, to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her
mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive.
The Indian, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're ' bullshittin'me!'
The social worker said, "Yeah, well. . You ' started it."

 

Keeping it on top!!


HAPPY FALL ...YA ALL!!

 

The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into office and said, ''You graduated from University and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" "Everything but my earrings."

 

Here’s the start of April’s 2011 .pdf file for us April 2011 TTR Addicts.
If you want to get on it, please e-mail me your:
NAMES, CANCUNCARE SCREEN NAMES, DATES YOU’LL BE THERE (IF YOU’RE THERE IN MOSTLY APRIL )(NOT GOING TO INCLUDE FOLKS THAT ARE THERE MOSTLY IN MARCH OR MAY THIS TIME) & A PICTURE OF YOU ALONG WITH YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS TO ME— vetter79@rochester.rr.com
Woody
315-986-7450
As the list updates, I will forward it to everyone on the list that I have addresses for.
Hopefully this worked out for most when we did it this year so let’s see if we can do it again!
Woody & Sue (We’ve booked for April 12th – 21st 2011)

 

A man returns home a day early from a business trip. It's after midnight.
While en route home he asks the cab driver if he would be a witness.

The man suspects his wife is having an affair and he wants to catch her in the act. For $100, the cab driver agrees.

Quietly arriving home, the husband and cab driver tip toe into the bedroom. The husband switches on the lights, yanks the blanket back and there is his wife in bed with another man!

The husband puts a gun to the naked man's head.

The wife shouts, 'Don't do it! I lied when I told you I inherited money.

HE paid for the Corvette I gave you.
HE paid for our new cabin cruiser.
HE paid for your season Pittsburgh Steelers tickets.
HE paid for our house at the lake.
HE paid for our country club membership, and HE even pays the monthly dues!'

Shaking his head from side-to-side, the husband lowers the gun. He looks over at the cab driver and says, 'What would you do?

The cab driver replies, 'I'd cover his ass with that blanket before he catches cold.'