April 2011 roll call...hahaha!!!!!

keeping it on top

Wow!! all weekend without being on cancuncare... was not an easy task.. haha!!

 

I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. The nurse started with certain basics.
"How much do you weigh?" she asked.
"135," I said.
The nurse put me on the scale.
"Well, actually, you weigh 180", she indignantly informed me.
The nurse asked, "Your height?"
"5 foot 4," I said.
The nurse checked and informed me that I only measure 5' 2".
She then took my blood pressure and told me that it is very high.
"Of course it's high!" I screamed. "When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I'm short and fat!"
She put me on Prozac ... What a bitch!

 

Keeping it on Top!!


Two blondes were going to Temptation Resort and Spa . They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Temptation Resort LEFT. They started crying and turned around and went home.

 

Keeping it on top!

Ok, that's it for me ... another storm warning for the Calgary area... with SNOW!!!..

I am running away to Temptation and staying there..lol .. oh, how I wish that were true... ;(

 

How many of the April group are thinking of or hoping to go back for April 2011?

 

Whats the difference between jam n marmelaide? U cant marmelaide ur dick down some chick's throat

 

Thinking we might follow a certain Calgary couple down to Mexico again

 

Hmmmm.... Perhaps you were otherwise occupied

(I think we owe Randy a bottle of tequila)

 

All of us of course!!!! :huepfen021:

 

Words for Women to Live By in 2010



1. Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.

2. If the shoe fits - buy them in every color.

3. Take life with a pinch of salt.... A wedge of lime, and a shot of tequila.

4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

9. Lead me not into Temptation, I can find it myself.

10. Don't get your knickers in a knot; it solves nothing and makes you walk funny.

11. When life gives you lemons in 2010 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

12. Remember where ever there is a good looking; sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bullshit!

13. Keep your chin up, only the first 40 years of parenthood are the hardest..

14. If it has Tires or Testicles it's gonna give you trouble.

15. By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong..

'Good friends are like stars..........You don't always see them, but you know they are always there' 'Remember yesterday, dream about tomorrow, but live for today'. Now smile and send to any girl wasting time at work, suffering from a hangover, or just suffering from life , that might need a reason to smile!