How would you show by clothing or actions in a subtle way that you are or are not in an open relationship?
No need to be subtle at TTR or Desire. As conversations evolve, simply inform those you are speaking with. If in the LS, many wear upside down pineapple attire, black bands on right hand, necklaces with pink, blue, clear, green beads, or the white with red lips Cancun Swingers brackets. These are the folks that will not be offended. Those not in the LS (vanilla) may be offended...or not...you never know. We, do not care what others do or don’t do and/or how they live their lives.
Usually people can get the feel. We are not LS, and are pretty innocent, but love to party in the sexually charged atmosphere. I have found that LSers use open ended questions... about past LS trips and cruises...how long have you been LS, etc. to see how we respond. We are never offended, even take it as a compliment. Most LSers pick up pretty quick in the conversation. Before we knew the subtle signs Kay was wearing a black ring on her right finger (she didn't know) and we were getting more attention than usual. Once it was pointed out (in the large hot tub at pool closing time) we had a good laugh with all involved the ring disappeared. We have came across a few couples with a specific game plan, the female half will make contact and flirt while the male will be cordial and friendly. After they find out we are not LS they move on, the female will still be friendly when we run across them wherever but her dude will totally ignore us. If you are LS you know the game. If you are dabbling/new in LS just be honest. If you are vanilla just be yourself. Some of our best friends at TTR are full LS, we still have a blast with them.
Thanks. That was part of the curiosity, sounds like once LSers know you aren’t, you kinda fall on the outside?
I will jump in...it depends on the LS’ers. We have friends and party with both. Makes no difference to us. Whom you have and do mot have sex with is your business, and not anyone else’s business! There do not need to be justifications, etc. Many are on a journey and the “rules” now may not be the “rules” tomorrow. No harm, no foul! Now for your term “outside”...yes once LS’ers know (and the word does get around or there are lots of both fair and unfair assumptions) you will or should not be hounded. A polite no is no. As far as the asshole LS’ers whom find out you are not interested (or just assume so) that ignore you, that is a discussion for another time. Yes, they are on a plan and do have limited time. But, if all were hitting it off before popping the magical question than why should the fun stop just because you choose to not have sex with them??? They are basically assholes.
Not at all. Very few of the LS couples exclude vanilla. I was just pointing out something we have experienced a few times. FakeNewsTeam is probably right about some having limited time and things to get done. Also we have noticed that vanilla sometimes attract attention because there are no games or intentions ... just wanting to have fun. We have always felt included and part of the fun.
Yes, we were hit on often at first by those trying to close the deal quickly and attempting to get as much in in their limited visit as possible. Kind of like notches on the belt. Of course, we be we are quality and not quantity type people/couple
We have gone to Temptation 5 times now since 2012 and are not part of the lifestyle at all. We have never had any issues with anyone understanding and respecting that. 99% of the time when we first meet people they will ask if we have been before, what we think of the resort or something like that. At some point early on I generally find myself saying something like..."We actually almost didnt come here our first time because we were worried it was only meant for people in the lifestyle and we wouldnt fit in. We are so glad we didnt make that mistake. Greatest place ever!!" I think respect is the biggest thing and it goes both ways. I find more often that its others who are not in the lifestyle that need to check themselves. Theres a big difference between walking through the grocery store at home, holding hands with your spouse and having someone come and hit on her as if you dont exist vs. A couple coming up to you and being flirty at Temptation....but, for whatever reason they treat the situations the same and will tell us this as if we would validate their asshole reaction to it.
