Ryan, you are so right. I feel as men, we dont talk about a lot of things, well because were men. Were supposta be the strong ones, were suposta be the bread winners, were suposta, suposta suposta. The reality is, that we have feelings and emotions too. My wife (as well as yours I'm sure) is the most amazing creature, woman, inspirational being, supportive of my crazy shit, puts up with my crazy shit person I have ever met, I guess that's why she married me ahahha. In 2014 shopping with her for swim wear and being old angry Wally while she was getting ready for lingerie night sure opened my eyes. It taught me a lot, and I will never forget the lessons. I was sending her skimpy swim wear before we went, and she was mad at me, then she started to do it to me, and she was like "what you will look hot" I was like "are you fucking crazy" then I got the big eyes, and the light bulb went on. Theme night shopping and support while getting ready is no different for a man, or a woman. If your not comfortable when you leave your room, your most likely not going to be all night. The process is so amazing, and that's why I encourage all men, even when they are uncomfortable to participate. This environment is so wild shits going to happen, and you need to keep yourself in check. We all have rules going in, we all talk about the "What if scenarios" and they do happen, like "you stumbling onto your spouse while there kissing another, even though you had a no kissing rule" And not a peck on the cheek kind of kiss. Yup there's a conversation that happens, no your not mad, it just is. Why? Because your on vacation and there not trying to steal your spouse. That does not mean that its right or wrong, but definitely a conversation for sure. Now that rule does not exist, just for the record hehe. And yes your right, the people on the forum are good people, I personally love to encourage and support new people, and help the other ones work through things like the above. We are all human and shit does happen, its all about how we support each other through these things that counts. I have met some amazing people in the shit show for sure, and totally wish that we were going with you and your wife, because you seem to get it, right out of the gate. You should be able to talk with anyone at any time in this group, regardless of the kind of conversation it is, even a heated one. We can agree to disagree and it is what it is. At least, thats the way it should be, as adults. And yes there is always next year
Most of our friends from home would never entertain the idea of going to a place like this. The first few times our friends asked where we going and we were honest about TTR we got some interesting reactions lol. Not to sound arrogant but I really don't think they have the relationship and the communication that Dani & I have. They almost give you a look like "well they must be dis-satisfied with each other to go somewhere like that". What they seem to not understand is it is the complete opposite, we are going for us not anything else. A relationship should always keep growing and this is just simply another attempt to do that. I had the same "skimpy swim wear" thing happen to me also. She said just order some shorter, tighter shorts and see what you think. Well they came in and she says "I love those!" It seems I will be wearing them on the trip whereas I only initially ordered them to appease her lol..... But how could I ask her to walk around in a thong because I like it and not wear something she likes? Seems hipocritical to me......
I hear you on all fronts my friend. Our friends look at us like were crazy, my co workers think i'm a freak. (I think it was last time that my boss was like, hey are you going to the gay homo resort again) I was like yup, is that a bad thing? Were just open and free, there's still rules. Its not a free for all. Shit I dont even get a hall pass, I have to ask, and make sure my wife is all ok with whatever im doing or going to do. Shes my primary and always will be. Monogamous 99% of the time. People just don't seem to understand that part, or how we could go to a place like that, and be a little more open and free. The hypocritical part of this, is how can I expect that she let me do my thing, if I'm not open to what she wants too. The door swings both ways. Nothing taught me that lesson more, than the swimsuit thing. Now I ask her what her opinion is of my suits (even this year, she left me a note on my computer hehe) especially when I'm pushing my own comfort levels, and shes brutally honest, even if its going to hurt my feelings. Because if I am uncomfortable I'm not going to have a good time, and the door swings both ways! If shes not comfortable in her swimwear (or lack there of) then the show is 100% over! I love the dialog Ryan, Be free my friend. To the others reading, and not talking: Its such a very cool thing the whole process, from beginning to end. Couples, especially couples, reading the dialog between me and Ryan, we are all here for you. We are all here to support you and your process together as couples. There is no reason you cant go, be free, have fun, push boundaries and support each other at the time. We as couples are all in a different space, and we are 100% open to conversations on an honest level. Drinks in the pool, on me. literally
16 - 21 Robert and Jennifer North Carolina Couple first time to TTR Looks like we got lucky and booked an amazing week with the ShitShow!
You definately did!! You dont join a group called the Shitshow unless you're ready to party ur ass off.....nothin but great people looking to get stupid for a week or so here. Welcome to the Shitshow!!
Thanks Wally! Enjoyed reading your post yesterday explaining just what TTR is and what we should expect to see and do. Look forward to meeting everyone.
For sure guys! were a team dammit! hehe, a shit show, but still a team Lots of good things in this thread, and lots of experienced people to guide you. Think of this place like spring break for adults, its the simplest way to describe it. are you ready for theme nights, Epic, shits show style?
Tested the body paint that glows in the dark, and the body paint that reacts to UV light, both a success on Zebras skin! They failed to ship my super cool sparkly UV nail polish, and the body glitter, which im a little bummed about, so I emailed them last night. We will see what happens. The search continues.
